Whether family by birth or family by choice, those closest relationships challenge us the most! They challenge us to speak our truth and they challenge us to listen.
Yet, the biggest challenge arises in listening to one’s own heart. The clutter of expectations and drama, might cloud the inner dialogue. Especially during times of stress.
How can we make everyone happy?
We cannot.
How can we make everyone understand us?
We cannot
Rifts and barriers exist where we wish there were none. Yet, truth is, those rifts and barriers exist. Not because we aren’t good people, but because we are unique, different, and have our own opinions and preferences. We can only allow others to be where they are. And when they cannot allow us to be ourselves because of their judgments, we also get to be with that as well.
Yet, we desire for everyone to be happy and we want everyone to understand…
We may not be able to attain those desires.
I should be able to make it okay. I should be able to sit down, shut up and let others abuse me for the sake of family harmony.
Not.
There is no easy answer as each moment, each situation holds its own experience. Perhaps one moment we can be quiet and hold sacred ground for peace. The next moment we cannot allow compliance to overshadow the peace of our own truth that must be spoken.
We can only do our best to be our best self. If triggered by another’s judgment or opinion of us, we might lose our sacred ground and become reactive. Family has the unique ability to find our “Hot Buttons” and push them quite effectively! It takes time to disengage those “Hot Buttons” so they become non-reactive. How do we do that? We move into our sacred truth. Our sacred truth has no energetic charge. Sacred Truth has no need to react or change another person, their thoughts or their perceptions. Sacred Truth just IS.
Ask yourself, what is my truth? If family (or dear friends as close as family) judge or dismiss something you feel is important or significant, what is your truth? Not, “They shouldn’t judge me.” Or “My point of view is right and theirs is wrong.” But rather, what is your Sacred Truth. Perhaps family/friends are dismissing your desire to go back to school – projecting onto you
what they think you should do. . . your Sacred Truth might be . . . “Going to school feels right for me.”
Period. End of story. They get to have their opinion. You COULD be making a big mistake . . . or you COULD be doing exactly what is perfect for your next step. Time will tell. In the meantime, you are making a choice and taking action in your own best interest. Notice how the truth statement, “Going to school feels right for me,” holds no energetic charge. No need to do battle. No need to defend. Sacred Truth. Find your Sacred Truth in whatever situation and you will find strength and power.
Even so, if we do slip and become reactive, we can only do our best to apologize and make amends.
It’s time to find balance between the love of our family and the love of our own truth. When the path is unclear, we can only hope to listen to our heart of hearts rather than our triggered feelings.
May Love and Truth guide you into the richest blessings of kindness and a sense of belonging.